a fresh start

I am a slacker.

I am starting over starting April 1st, tomorrow.

A friend is doing it with me.

Chad asked, "Are you doing it for real this time?"

I wanted to punch him. Then I cried.

weigh in

I feel like the tortoise in the story of the tortoise and the hare. I totally admit that I am not taking this very seriously. I could be doing so much better. But I am okay with my progress for now. Will I reach my goal before our Florida vacation? Probably not. And I am okay with that.

Current weight: 220.8
Starting weight: 227.something (I can't remember and don't want to look it up.)
Mini-goal: 199

dieting sucks and I suck at it

I admit it...I am a self sabotager. It seems I do much better in "making healthier choices" when I do it quietly, with little fanfare. It is like I put this pressure on myself to perform well for other people when really I need to do this for myself. So when I don't talk about it a lot or don't over analyze things then I am pretty consistent with my healthier eating choices and exercise. When I talk about it all the time and think about it all day, that is when I cave and crumble and eat donuts, Girl Scout cookies, and maple nut ice cream and don't step on the elliptical for 2 weeks.

At the same time I need some sort of accountability. I love having cheerleaders. I love having Chad tell me he is proud of me for rockin' out on the elliptical. I want to quietly go about my business but I love when people tell me I am doing a good job. How do you accomplish that balance? I don't know.

I have been a total slacker for the last...oh...three weeks....like no dieting, no exercising...just living my life in this food induced fog. I feel like crap when I eat crap but that doesn't stop me from indulging in the garbage. I don't sleep very well. I feel guilty. I get mad at myself. I pig out to cover up those feelings. I am an addict. I am addicted to food.  Yay me.

weigh in

Slow and steady wins the race, right?

I need to kick it in high gear. I want to be at my mini-goal by the the time we get to Florida. I have about 2 months to get that done. No more slackin' off for rme.


Starting weight: 227.8
Current weight: 221.6
Mini-goal: 199

munchies

Why do I want to eat everything in sight when it is "that time of the month?" I have a major case of the M-U-N-C-H-I-E-S!!!

helpful? and weigh in

I have the flu (self diagnosed). Not the respiratory flu. Or the vomit flu. The other end flu. I am hoping it will be helpful in shedding some pounds this week.

Starting weight: 227.8
Current weight: 222.6 (down from last week and this past week was as non-diety as you can get)
Mini-goal: 199

extra motivation

This week has sucked. I am afraid to get on the scale on Monday. I might skip it just to save myself the anguish.
Thankfully, I have some very exciting events coming up that is motivating me to get back in the game (i secretly can't stand sports metaphors but don't know how else to say it.)

We are going to Florida in the next several weeks. You can read all about it here, on my other blog.  I need to kick my ass in gear. Yes, my ass. I need to make it smaller. Much smaller. I have some pretty cute sundresses to wear and I want to feel good about myself. I can DO it!!!